Intractable Varmint Alert

November 21, 2011 § 8 Comments

Suppose you have a private fishing pond, fenced and locked with a sign that warns: NO TRESPASSING.  My mother will laugh at you as she writhes under your gate and starts casting into the trees around your pond.  Like the squirrels she detests, my mother spares no acrobatics in going after her prize fishing holes. She will scamper across fences, rappel down from trees, and stack her grandchildren into a pile she can use to hoist herself over the wall.  Guard towers, poison baits, infrared warning systems, claymore mines.  Don’t even bother.  Like the nutria of Lousiana and the northern snakehead of Virginia, once introduced, she is impossible to eradicate.


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