Varmints and writing

October 5, 2011 § 11 Comments

My mother hates squirrels because the outrageous varmints rob her garden in their narcissistic quest to keep from starving.  I picture her at night, hovering her crops Mission-Impossible-style, supported by wires, gathering information.  Some of her anti-squirrel tactics have been adopted by the Navy SEALS and Interpol.  When I visited her last summer, I ordered some squirrel statues from Amazon and placed them covertly among her precious crops.  Later that morning I heard the satisfying blast of her shotgun. The images you created with your writing are  the squirrels that you put in your reader’s garden. The object is always to make those squirrels seem real as possible.

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§ 11 Responses to Varmints and writing

  • Those fake squirrels look dangerous and they may be angry

  • Kitty says:

    I’m sorry to say that I must side with your mother on this one, not because I hate squirrels, but because anyone who can flip off squirrels with her foot is okay in my book.

  • Eric Hall says:

    Don’t blame the squirrels; it’s just the way they are written.

  • Bridget says:

    Kathy this is so funny. I can see aunt Polly fliping em off as she reloads. My son has recently gotten a bb gun and my husband sets the cans along the fence for him to practice. About a week ago i hear a awful comotion and run out only to find my five year old son and our pound rescued basit hound who has one tooth left in his head, tangeld up in the fence when I ask what happen ect. He said ” i shot two squirrels with my bb gun and they fell so i got my hound and we were hot on the trail momma till this here fence stopped us.” while untangling dog slash kid I decided he must be usuing his imagination. Theres no way he got any hits it must be a lie. Well bout a week later we started smelling something foul coming from the fence and tree line. We found a very dead squirrel. So tell aunt polly I have a five year old sniper armed with a bb gun that I will loan her

  • eric a says:

    Maybe she doesn’t like squirrels because she’s nuts.

  • Dot says:

    Thats just funny, i can see your mom mounting her attack. What i would like to see is her neighbor’s as they watch her, i bet they turn off tv an watch her instead. I luv your momj

  • Bridget says:

    Two weeks too late eww. Lol thats more jd and dads thing.

  • Michele Wilhite says:

    I can picture those cute squirrley guys I used to feed. I even had a little two-seater. “corn nibbler” for them! And yes, they did use the seats to nibble their corn!!

    Also, I wanted to tell you how PERFECT the cover for Blue Asylum is! That is just what I imagined Iris’s dress looked like, and the white sun with the blue water! I love it!

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